Tag: recounted

i was at the summit doing some writing last night. peeked into the cafe and in the back was my high school friend whom i haven’t seen in about 10 years. i knew he lived here and always wondered when the day would be when i’d run into him. he looked exactly the same except, well, older. his voice was a lot less valley-stoner than it was back in the day. now it’s more pitchman-hipster-stoner (he does a lot of bicycle activist work and dj’ing). apparently another one of our high school friends is in the bay now, too.

he suggested we all meet up and i’m thinking, we’ll see if that actually happens or not. how does one catch up on more than a decade’s worth of life especially when we weren’t even that close back in the day (there’s a reason i haven’t seen him in 10+ years). MGS and i had a playwright over for dinner last week and he said to me that one of the things he appreciates most about being in his 30s is that we no longer have to shoot the shit with people we don’t want to associate ourselves with. if someone you’re indifferent towards invites you to be his/her friend (on facebook or otherwise), just say no. i have enough friends and don’t need more. when my high school friend suggested getting together, i wanted to ask him straight up: really? are you saying that cause you mean it or saying it just to be polite? because we could save one another a LOT of time and awkwardness now.

and then this morning on facebook, one of my college friend’s posted something to the effect of, “people should speak up sooner. you can’t go dragging shit from the past and use it against me now because it’s EXPIRED.” OH THERE ARE SO MANY PEOPLE I WANT TO SAY THAT TO! i loved that statement because it’s so true. history is really important and we need to learn from it — why still be friends with someone when you hold so much animosity/beef towards him/her after all these years? if you do want to be friends with that person again, learn to let it go. we’re too old for that stress.

on a totally different note, i’m at a total loss as to what i should do with my scripts’ narrative arcs. it’s been really difficult to say the least to formulate the grand vision. i have really strong first halves thought out, but i don’t know how to end any of the stories. the writer in me feels like life doesn’t unfold neatly — why should my scripts? the consumer in me feels like i go to the theater or movies and get really frustrated when there isn’t a conclusion to the plot. like surrogate valentine for instance — does she come out of the house?! JUST TELL US! we’re always looking for answers in life so why go to the theater to escape and have even more questions afterwards?

it’s a freaking amazing day out today. i arrived 20 minutes early to the pier today and just sat by the water. i learned that i can leave at least 10-15 minutes later than i usually do and still get to the office with time to spare. i really need to use the restroom, but each time i go, i have to page my supervisor. because of that, i feel like i have to limit myself to one pee in the morning and one pee in the afternoon. i’m also really annoyed because i’ve been breaking out like a mofo. i can feel another one growing on my chin (still really not sure why that’s been such a popular breakout area as of late…). damn you hormones and oil glands! yesterday i spent most of the day deleting old emails and managed to narrow my inbox from about 1000 to 300-ish. progress! maybe i should just archive those emails and start anew…

another beautiful day in the bay, another day at the architect’s office. i’ll be here through next tuesday, manning the phones, signing for packages, typing up notes. these guys are so self-sufficient compared to some of the other offices i’ve worked at. so refreshing.

i’m still trying to time my mornings so that i’m not arriving 30 minutes early like i was today. i ended up getting off the muni a few blocks away from the office and walked along the piers. the sun was rising over the bay bridge and everything was so calm. joggers ran by me and old chinese folks exercised by the water. pigeons and seagulls pecked at crumbs. boathouse residents cleared condensation from their windows.

whenever i look out to the ocean, i’m always hoping to see a whale. i mean, there never is one, but a whale to me represents the ULTIMATE ocean sighting. so large and majestic, yet who ever sees one? i almost died when i saw dolphins at ocean beach last year so i’m not sure i could handle a whale sighting. i might faint. it’s like seeing the president. you know he exists, but what are the chances you’ll ever catch a glimpse of him?

anyway, apart from the staff being so nice, i like this office because they blast a stereo pretty much the whole day. problem is it’s set on one station and today’s station keeps looping the same playlist. that means 6-7 more hours of the same songs. oy. i’m already thinking about lunch. another sandwich?

finally a sunny day in san francisco! this whole week is supposed to be beautiful, but unfortunately (or fortunately?), i’ll be temping wednesday through tuesday at the architecture firm. if they give me a longer lunch break, maybe i’ll be able to sit by the water and soak in the rays.

i decided to get off my lazy ass and explore the neighborhood gardening shops. one is all the way up divisadero called plant it earth. oy. they specialize in indoor plants so i bought a nice replacement succulent log (is that what it’s called?) for our bathroom. i’m really afraid it’s going to die in no time, but the saleslady gave me some caretaking tips — let’s pray this one will survive longer than the last one did. who knew that they just use a glue gun of all things to attach the plan to the log!

after that, i hopped on the 24 bus to hortica, our local gardening store. it has a cute backyard with a pretty decent selection of plants. asked the cashier what he recommends for a backyard with limited light and two very inept gardeners. he suggested geraniums. i was hoping he’d suggest something a bit more exotic. i’m thinking we’ll just stick to herbs.

it’s been pouring here. this morning i took the garbage out in my sweatpants, hoodie, and flip flops. i was soaked by the time i made my two trips back and forth first with the garbage and compost, then with the recycling. we’re running out of paper bags to hold our recycling so i dumped all the contents from one — a sturdy abercrombie bag with a pouty-lipped, ripped boy on front (of course) — and brought it back into the house. i guess if your store has such questionable hiring and marketing practices, your bag deserves to hold a bunch of trash.

speaking of a&f, it reminds me of that time in japan when NI and i went to their flagship store in tokyo. it was more club than retail shop. we were greeted on every floor by these frat boys dancing with sorority girls shouting, “hey, how’s it going” to us each time we passed. i’m pretty sure that was the only phrase they knew in english because it sounded more like “ay! how sowing?” i’m also pretty sure they were forced by management to be perky, betraying their true personalities. it must be a pretty fun gig though – if you’re a douche.

jeff yang wrote a piece on japan’s recovery from past devastation — let’s all hope that there is a light at the end of the tunnel in this case, as well.

i saw lady gaga’s ridiculous concert last night! i was the lucky guest of WY whose boyfriend is on a business trip in asia and couldn’t make it. the seats were smack dab center – far enough back that we had to look at the jumbotrons for her facial reactions, but close enough that we could still see her (and her dancers’ – yum) amazing abs. she performed all of her greatest hits including born this way and a few unreleased tracks. as expected, she changed a gazillion times: red cape with heavy shoulder-padding, barely there black bikini, scaly green skirt that was pulled off to reveal a sparkling, green leotard, latex evening gown, firework-bra, blood, etc. she’s so theatrical that i found myself thinking, shit – i’d rather watch this than a musical any day!

while i was a fan before, i actually have a lot more respect for her as a businesswoman, artist, and person now. there was a tender moment during her show where she talked about how her middle and high school classmates would poke fun at her so she’d spend much of her childhood feeling really insecure. as she sat on the toilet one day crying, her mother came in for a pep talk telling her, “everyone is born a superstar. you just have to build your stage and they will come.” and look what she’s become. i admit i was ridiculously moved.

she went on to say that sometimes when she’s not feeling so brave, she remembers all the little monsters out there who turn to her for strength and courage and so she dons a brave face for them. beyond the whole role model blah blah blah thing, it takes a shitload of chutzpah to be so “out there” and so dedicated to the gaga brand, 24-7. i mean, there are some days when i feel that deep-inside i’m a redhead, but there is no way in hell i am going to dye my hair fire engine red and parade around while people stare at me and expect my personality to match my look. that’s A LOT of pressure. it got me thinking about what in the world my visual brand would even be. bowl haircut? mr. roger’s cardigans? pimply face? and you know how they say fake it ’til you make it? if i had fire engine red hair, would people really treat me all that differently? image is everything — how far would i be willing to go?